Maybe?

My mind has been on overload lately. When I ponder the last year & a half, it almost doesn't seem like my life anymore. It seems like it could have been one of my dear friends, someone I comforted rather than all of the kind people who comforted me. I hope I'm a deeper person, & the better for it, but I get a glimpse of my growth only as I face each new trial. It seems it takes a trial to define our character. As a friend of mine once said... It's who we are in a crisis that shows our true colors. When life is good, it's easy to be good.

When life is sad, it's easy to be sad. This morning's Daily Bible Verse says that because God is faithful & loves us, we don't have to be consumed with our trials. In all my life, I don't think I've ever heard/seen this verse  (Lamentations 3:22-23). I have to admit, it is my nature to be consumed with my trials. My brain just naturally gravitates toward my troubles. I think allowing this verse to take hold in my heart would be a healthy step for me.

Over the last year & a half, I think I have learned to enjoy the happy  moments along life's way &  not constantly be dogged by my unknowns. It's true... God blesses us with laughter amidst our sorrows. I find this to be one of the most fascinating paradoxes of life. I have experienced it many times over, & it never ceases to blow my mind. It's like a flower amongst the weeds or the calm after the storm. We see this pattern over & over. It seems that God reaches through our troubles & touches our hearts when our trials are deepest.

As the verse in Lamentations says... His compassions are new every day. Hmnnnn... perhaps the smile that comes as tears stream from our eyes, the rainbow, the flower, the silly joke, a giggle, a kind heart... Perhaps all of these things are an expression of God's compassion. Maybe God truly does count each tear that falls from my eye. Maybe He hurts to see me suffer. Maybe that's why He sends the sunshine after the rain? Maybe that's why the person who suffered so deeply a year ago now remembers  it as if she comforted a dear friend instead of being the recipient of so much kindness?