IMPOSTERS

When I decided a few weeks ago to pick up this blog, & give it a go, I didn't waste much time thinking about it. I love writing, but lately, I just haven't had the words. I was thinking about my team, Team Sweet Potatas, & trying to figure out how in the world I will reach my goal of $10,000. The only thing I can think to do is write about the the Breast Cancer Survivor. You see, I know her. You may know me, but I don't know if you know the fabric of which I am made.

My fabric no longer has the beauty of youth, & it wouldn't even if I never had cancer. I am one of the lucky ones. (If you believe in luck. I don't). But, for the most part, my scars are hidden. Yes, they are real but few people ever see them.  My clothes cover them, & so people who don't know me probably would not know I am a Survivor unless I choose to tell them.

I have 2 eye brows which are not my originals. They look nothing like my originals, & I am okay with that. They are tattoos. I have implants, & they are what I call imposters. They are pretenders, not my originals. As the tee shirt says, "My real ones tried to kill me." These fakes don't feel like me either, but truth is, I am okay with that too. My worth has never come from them, & that is probably a good thing since what I have in their place is really no comparison.

I had radiation, & now my radiated skin is deteriorating. This radiated skin causes a multitude of problems, but few people understand what that means. My Radiologist explained all of this to me before radiation, but it had little meaning at the time. How do you understand something when you have no mental picture, no reference point? The information you are receiving is incomprehensible.

Well... there's a few other problems too, but I will get to them a little at a time. If this bores you, I understand  & beg you to disregard this blog. There's so much to share, but then, what is TMI? Sometimes it's hard to know, & then I must ask, will this further my cause? I hope so. Knowledge is power, right? So... I figure the more I share, the more the reader will understand the need for a cure. Hopefully, people will give generously. Feel free to give to any team. It all helps the same cause. We need a cure.

As I share with you, I am inviting you to become acquainted with the fabric that makes me. It's not the same fabric that once knit me together. It has a few patches, some rips & tears, holes, is shredded in places, & perhaps has some new pretty patterns. Sometimes I don't recognize my own fabric. It's unique, & it won't match that of any other Survivor. However, there are common threads that we all share. Some of my problems are universal Breast Cancer problems. Some of them are a bit rare, & some of them might belong only to me. Welcome to my world. Please feel free to comment, ask questions, or disregard this blog altogether. It may not be your cup of tea.