It doesn't matter.

Last night was a special night, a perfect night from my point of view. We had the whole family together. I treasure these moments for a few reasons. #1  It's hard to get everyone together. #2  We have so much fun. My husband has said for years that I have "Norman Rockwell" expectations. I have to say he's right. I like my stars aligned when it comes to my family. I love being together, & when we are together, I hope we get along.

Sometimes family stuff can be rough. Sometimes we like to put our 2 cents in when it isn't necessary. Human nature seems to mean we cut our family members less slack then we do the rest of the world. We tend to think our boundaries are endless, & we can say whatever we want. I used to think that was the case. I used to think it was okay to be brutally honest in the name of family. I'm all about the truth but only in a loving manner.

I believe we should treat our family members with the same respect we give our best friends. It's not okay to verbalize whatever thought comes into our brain at the risk of hurting someone else. This "no offense, but" attitude just doesn't work. If something is offensive, think of a better way to say it, or perhaps don't say it at all.

This last year has made me realize (with new depth) what it means to be a family. I have treasured my family every day of my life (even the not so pretty days). The less than pretty moments have taught me so much. I've learned through them that I want better, & we are capable of better. It takes some self control, but mostly love, the kind of love that puts the other person first. It's love that says... "it's not about me."

When family members begin to love each other with a love that puts others first, things begin to change. Maybe it's just maturity, maybe it takes losing your sense of security. I don't really know what it takes, but I do know this kind of love is priceless. When we find this love, it strips away all the things that don't matter. It no longer matters what we do when we are together, what we wear, or what we have. It no longer matters if we get to put our 2 cents into words. It doesn't matter what we've said or done in the past.  It becomes just about being together. It's the best!