To My Valentine...

Dear Valentine,

We met when we were only kids, 13 & 14. You caught my eye the first time I saw you (at a car wash). I remember going home with a giggle in my heart. I couldn't wait to see you again!  The next thing I knew... we ended up in Biology together. I sat right behind you. Even though the class was hard for me, it was okay, because you were there. I would get to see you, & my whole being would light up.

As Homecoming approached our Sophomore year, I hoped you would ask me to the dance. My best friend assured me you would. So... when somebody else asked me, I simply said, "I'm sorry I cannot go with you, I am waiting for someone else to ask me."  Finally, you asked me. When the keys got locked in the car that night, it was okay, because you were there.

The summer after our Senior year, you gave me a promise ring. You even wrote me a poem, "With this ring, I thee love."  I loved that ring, & more importantly, I loved you. But... what did I do?  I broke your heart. I broke up with you. It was not okay, but I was confused. I thought I knew what I needed. How wrong I was.

Several months later, we reconnected at my brother's wedding. I caught the bouquet; you caught the garter.  I had to ask, "Was this fate?" I wrote you a letter. My tears dripped onto the notebook paper. I invited you back into my life.  I promised that I meant my words & was sorry for taking you for granted.

With tears in your eyes, you had promised me you would wait for me. I was almost annoyed. I didn't want you to wait for me. I told you NOT to wait for me. But, you did! You welcomed me back with open arms, complete forgiveness, & plans for a future. My life would be okay, because you were there.

Soon we were married & had our first dog. I had a tough job. I was scared, but it was okay, because you were there. When I came home crying every night, you listened, & when I couldn't do it anymore, you said it was okay.  We had 3 daughters. Life was full. You worked long hours. We made mistakes. We celebrated small joys. My Dad got sick. I got sick. Our daughter had major surgery. We had 3 teenagers.  But it was okay, you were there.

Recently, you walked our second daughter down the aisle. This time, I was really sick. I wore a wig. I had 2 more chemo treatments to complete. The New Year would bring surgery. Uncertainties filled the air. We heard the words, "for richer, for poorer, in sickness, & in health..." Almost 30 years later, these words had new meaning.

During this illness, I have realized that if the shoes were reversed, I would not be okay. Without your presence, I am not okay. You have had to face the last 6 months, not knowing if your sweetheart would be there. That is not okay. I am thanking God for being the recipient of a miracle, simply, because we are not okay without each other.

Love,  Susie